Start Each Day With A Grateful Heart

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to start off by saying that this is my first blog post and hopefully my first of many. I am writing this blog post to give people an idea of who I am, how I became who I am and why I decided to do my business the way I am. I want to make it clear for everyone to comprehend that I don’t expect sympathy, this is merely me giving you the cold, hard truth in order for some reflection and possibly some closure for myself by opening up to everyone about my struggles.

Where to start! These past couple of years have been tough to say the least... mentally, physically and slowly but surely it stripped away all my self esteem, any bit of confidence I had as well as my mental health. I was in a state of utter chaos. To think back and say one event is what changed me is hard, because it hurts me to admit I cowered to and changed the person I am to become who I am now trying to heal due to that one event. But it did!

What happened to me made me feel utterly trapped for what seemed like eternity and I felt like I was stuck in a big pile of quick sand... every time I tried to escape I would sink further into the mess that was surrounding me. I honestly look back to it now and believe I truly feared to move on from something that had been so deeply encasing not only me but my friends and family as well that if I did, I would have nothing. In the process I ended up choosing what I thought was someone else’s happiness over myself and my self-worth plummeted for the worst.

When it came down to my family and friends basically giving me the ultimatum to let go or lose them because they were so damn sick of seeing how hurt and betrayed I was every time a new matter rose out of an already giant problem... I finally decided to free myself. I freed myself from a horrible toxic parasite that only wanted to keep feeding on me - taking every inch of my identity I had! Because of this, I had to rebuild myself completely and not everyone accepted this and it was another battle in itself.

I was so angry at EVERYTHING and EVERYONE, I viewed my whole life so negatively and felt attacked whenever someone said something to try and support me, I was bitter and I felt like the whole world was against me. I didn’t understand why other people got things they wanted so easily and I was stuck in a rut not getting anything... why was life doing this to me? The last few years, oh my god they have been tough. Nothing worked out how I wanted it to like or what  I dreamed about in my mind, and that made it so much harder to snap back to reality and realise I still had nothing and yet still had to figure out how the hell I was going to mend myself from all the pain I felt.

I soon began to realise that the reason nothing was going the way I wanted was because of all the negative energy I was putting out into the universe was being returned to me in tenfolds! I began to neglect my health and just eventually accepted that I’m this person - the negative, spiteful and bitter person who has nothing. Really? In that moment it was like reality hit me hard and I woke up!

I can be whatever I want to be, I have the word at my hands and it’s waiting for me to take every opportunity I get and run with it. It took me so damn long to understand the concept of how powerful your mind is and how much it influenced your reality... I realised I wasn’t a negative person but I had chosen to respond to every outcome in a negative light instead of taking a positive approach. I always chose to be jealous of people achieving things rather than being happy for them - because I felt like I deserved it as well. When I think about this, I feel so sad. Sad that I let myself become like this and let a parasite shape me into this. Now when I reflect, I know I have so much to be thankful for - my mum, dad, sisters, my other family, friends, animals, having a house and good food, having a job... THE LIST GOES ON! There are so many people living lives of poverty and here I am ruining myself being unhappy with what I don’t have when I should be happy with all the incredible things I do have! The best thing to come out of this year for me was realising what I wanted from my career. Which leads me to this:

This year has been amazing. Of course, I have my bad days BUT I am so gracious for what I do have and I have got myself back. I am happy (most of the time), I have self-confidence and can look in the mirror and appreciate what I love about myself as well as accept the things I don’t particularly like but let the good things outweigh the bad things! I’ve turned my passion into a business - which I know will only grow and I’m so excited for what the future holds for me.

Obviously, everyone has there ups and downs and no one is perfect but the beauty of that is that everyone is different and we just need to learn to accept hints as they come and take the option to look at things with a positive mindset rather than a negative one. Life is a mystery, a challenge, it’s beautiful and can be harsh but if you are daring enough and take the steps forward rather than back you can achieve anything you set your mind to! I’ve made steps this year to try and move forward, like exercising regularly, eating cleaner, seeing my older friends again, cutting out toxic things in my life that were only bringing me down, quit a job that I was miserable at and always do something that puts me outside of my comfort zone - whether it’s wearing shorts or skirts or dresses to try and become more accepting of the way I look, or if it was talking to a stranger or looking at myself in my full glory in the mirror! I have worked so hard this year for my business to build my clientele and can’t wait for 2018. 2017 has been kind to me, it has challenged me, broken me, rebuilt me and created a brand new and improved Bek who is ready to go and face whatever is in her way with a new HEALTHY mindset.

My biggest lesson of 2017 is to always choose to be optimistic when life throws something not so good at you rather than being negative, it makes a world of difference. The universe reflects your thoughts and you are the master of your thoughts, never forget.

Lastly, I would just like to set some goals for myself for this upcoming year..
- To find complete contentment with my life even if it is not exactly how I expected it to go.
- Embrace all the positive things around me and be grateful for what I have.
- Make a change and help people such as myself or younger girls even older woman who may have body confidence issues, struggles from high school like I did and refusing to believe the expectations social media place on us.

I had someone take my self worth and confidence which had a huge impact on not only me, but everyone involved in my life and I will never let anyone do that to me again. It’s so important to never lose sight of who you are as a person and never mould yourself to fit another’s person standards. I want to make it very clear for everyone, my work is MY work and I refuse to change it to fit the “social norm” or “expectations of the majority”. My work is based on enhancing the lovely, beautiful and NATURAL features that girls/women already have been blessed with. Why change something that does not need to be changed? Us, as women need to set good examples for younger girls and be accepting of the fact that everyone is different and you will never meet another you, so why change yourself to try and morph into someone you want to look like? Being UNIQUE is beautiful!

“Stop hating yourself for everything you aren’t and start loving yourself for everything you already are.” 

This year I aim to increase the services I have to offer, I also hope to develop programs and awareness for self love and confidence in young children, adults and mature adults that are struggling to love themselves and help them find the confidence they truly deserve!